If you’re dealing with heartbreak, stop being delusional. Stop lying to yourself and imagining what could have happened—it didn’t happen. Face reality. If you got out of a bad situation or someone did you wrong, stop constantly reminding yourself about the sweet memories.
You might think, I love them, I cherish them, I will hold on to them forever. I will never let those things go. I will keep them with me forever and reference them constantly, even tell my children about them. However, when you’re healing, you can’t keep reminding yourself of those moments because it tricks you.
It tricks you into thinking that something is still there. It tricks you into believing you left something good behind or that something was ripped away from you. That’s not the case. If someone forfeits their position in your life, it’s their loss.
If you’re reading this, I know you’re a good person. I know you’re hurt—I’m hurt too. But I cannot keep reminding myself of those sweet memories, the peace, and the love. You have to remind yourself of what people did to you—not to point fingers or demonize anyone. I’m not going to demonize anyone I’ve been with. I loved my person, regardless of what happened.
In this moment, though, they weren’t good for you. You weren’t compatible. Your life plans and paths didn’t align. Things just didn’t work out, and that’s okay. Life is about meeting people, creating experiences, and learning from them.
If you think this is the last time you’ll meet someone and create meaningful experiences, you’re wrong. There are billions of people in the world and millions you can interact with. I understand the sentiment of, There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but I want that fish.
That mentality is natural—it’s one I’ve had too. But just because you want that fish doesn’t mean that fish wants you. It doesn’t mean that fish wants to be wanted. That fish might just want to swim freely or might not know any better.
You’ve got to keep living. Instead of sitting around listening to sad music and letting sadness creep into an idle mind, deal with what you have to deal with. Then occupy yourself. Do things you love. Work. Run. Work out. Just do something.
An idle mind is a workshop for negativity, so don’t give it the space. You’ll be fine. If you need support, reach out to me. Life will keep lifing, but you’ve got this.
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